Introduction
“The life is not a direct corridor and easy to cover which we can walk freely without limits but a labyrinth with different passages, through of which we have to seek our way; lost and confused, where sometimes finished by going to blind alley. But if we have faith, Lord always open to us a gate, perhaps not that one our selves had been planed, but a gate which by His essence will prove be good for us” (A.J. gronin)
The contemporary culture which lost the concept of person equally lost the maturity of person. Sometimes, I see my life as something vacuum without value, although this life is the best gift given by God. Therefore, I want to give a value to a little events happened that marked my daily life and the main thing I try to answer these questions; who am I? Where I came from? Why I am here and where am I going? So ever since, I try to give thank for this miracle before I will celebrate the silver party of my birth or twenty fifth anniversaries
For 25 years old, oh my God, I don’t like to grow old! How wonderful this life although every day I must face many challenges, neither good nor bad experiences: happiness-sadness, love-loveless ness, courage-discourage, successful-unsuccessful, brave-fear…etc! Yes, this life like rose, it is beautiful and scented but surrounded by thorns. Those experiences are the based of my future. So I just want to describe this gold personal history like relic because this year is “thanksgiving” for 25 years my existence in the world.
The first sheet: My personal history
In the history of life human being is an emigrant; the pilgrim “of being”. Where just from the past can take any light for future because histories of the past dispose a way: take into consideration that the past will bring the daylight from the experience of life had realized and that inevitable limits the map of experience in the future.
I. My genesis
Once upon a time, two cells gathered to create the only one being in the universe: Afonso Sarmento Mendonça. Those cells were not coming vacuum, but full of genetics information. Every one brought in him a history; history of my father and the other side history of my mother.
At the time when they were meeting, Lord inspired into them blowing of the life and an explosion of light happened. My body was growing include the genetics information of my parents were making combination and defining my body - the color of my eyes, hair and skin, my mind with his temperaments, aptitude, ability…etc! So my body was defining mainly body, mind and spirit.
For 9 months I was in the breast of my mother, with her maternal loving care: I am the only one for her. Thank God I was born safe and sound! In that time I was cry because I found a new surrounding while my parents were very happy, Lord gave to them a precious gift: a child. Ever since, I began my personal history.
II. My childhood
That child was named “Mau Kafir”, traditional name which means shepherd. So when I was a child, every day I did my job like shepherd the cows in the forest. In 20th of May 1986, fourth months later, I was baptized by Father Eduardo Brito: “Afonso Sarmento Mendonça, I baptize you, in the Name of the Father, of the Son and the Holy Spirit”. From then on I won a name; by then Seloi Craic became a place for my family atmosphere. There where the place I was born and lived as I growing up. I was starting my childhood there. It was very happy to enjoy my childhood because when I was a child I could find toys everywhere but sometimes I did not enjoy it because I always falling ill.
My illiterate world was break down in the
For 3 years I was studying in Saint Mary Junior High School of Seloi. Here, I had been starting to study English and Portuguese, more over, I got the chance to correspondence with many friends from
III. Seminary Ainaro to Minor Seminary Balide
In 22nd of September I entered the Seminary Ainaro. It was the first time for me to leave my family. I gave a new step to my life.
The first trimester was very difficult for me; timid, fear, shy…etc! There, I found many experiences of life neither good nor bad. With the help of the formatters I studied to be a good boy, learned to develop my aptitude; I found my self as a very sensible and responsible being. I tried obeying the rules of the college. Here I found my way; where I must give response day by day along my life towards His calling, because I realize that He really calls me by my name. Be worth it for 3 years I navigated in that amazing place.
For 3 years I was studying in Saint Mary School Ainaro. My teachers were very nice so do my classmates. My daily activities were studying, working and praying. «Ora et Labora». Day by day I slept-woke up with note book because “book is my first girlfriend”. Thank God for 3 years I always got good result although I was not a brilliant pupil or the best student. At the last, I finished my studying in that amazing place with the best value in 2006 National Examination (Exame nacional do ano lectivo de 2005/2006).
I passed the entering test to the Minor Seminary Balide, Dili, before we did national exam. In 23rd of September 2006 I entered the Seminary. At that moment, a seminarian have to fill in three triangles namely, sanctitas, sanitas, sciencia (sanctity, health, science). In the first trimester I was filling all kinds of tests. Like a seminarian I must study hard to get good result just not the value but also to live it, a good life-living result as Latin prose says “non scholae sed vitae discimus.”
In second trimesters I had to leave it because my health was not so good; I fell ill. I just surfed there for six months. When I had left Seminary many people were mocking me by saying « you are cut out from being a seminarian, why did you go to seminary? You just embarrassed yourself? ». With tears running down from my eyes I said to them:” yes, I cut out from being a seminarian”.
Did I learn anything good along those chances? I did not understand anything but I got the best experiences in building up my life to become a better person.
For 6 months I just stayed at home, therefore, I almost cry every day when I saw my classmates were going to study in university.
I lived my life as a farmer; worked in the rice field, coffee field…etc! I always get involved in the political campaign because there were so many chances for dancing and meeting friends, it was a great entertaining.
I was bargained by NGO (Non Government Organization from
The second sheet: Experience of life
For several months ago, I wrote in my note-book:
I am the captain of my soul.
I am the captain of myself.
I am the captain of my future.
It is true but I can not do anything without interaction of “God and others”; my parents’ helping, my teacher, close friends, surroundings and cultures support my personal growth. The man is a social human being “homo homini socius” so by human relationship I trip from my selfish world and open the door of my world to others around me...I try it for 9 years since Seminary Ainaro till now
I. Convent Fatuberliu (three bothers)
I did not think that I would return to become a seminarian. One day as I went to attend the presidential election campaign my cousin asked me:“do you want to be Franciscan?” Immediately, without thinking too much, I answered: yes, I do! But I don’t know where their convent is? He leaded me to Franciscan convent. After getting all the information I had to prepare myself for the initiation test. It was very difficult, so some brothers of my batch did not pass, we were 17 persons.
In the 22nd of September 2007 I entered the Franciscan convent in Fatuberliu (a sub-district of Same located in south coast of
On the 30th of September 2007 I was integrated into Franciscan Order as postulant. The opening ceremony was held in the chapel of the convent of “Three Companions”, Fatuberliu. In that ceremony we received a TAU (Franciscan cross), Bible and wore the postulant habit. My life was marked with this message: “Afonso, try to be a good postulant”.
We were always active in the Parish categorical groups such as scout, altar boy, Franciscans youth, etc.! During this one year period we organized some events which marked my personal experience very much in Fatuberliu. We celebrated youth day or memory of the 12 of November where many Timorese young people were massacred in the
We (Postulant and Franciscan youth) went for a concert in the Alas Parish; the postulants were very professional in touching guitar and drum band. In the later day, we played football and volleyball against young people from Alas; it was pity for us because we were defeated by them in both games with score for football 2-3 and Volleyball. On our way back, it was happened to us an amazing event; people of the villages though that we are “ninja” so they wanted to attack us with traditional guns named”rama ambon”.
We were very happy although sometimes we worked hard for all day until forget to take lunch; one day a brother gave a shout:”Oh my Lord, is it temptation or torture?”
For a month we had to work really hard: painting wall, windows and doors… etc! Our daily activities were working in the construction of the new convent.
Finally, on the 3rd of October 2008, “servus pacis” was inaugurated by Bishop Alberto Ricardo. There was present Br. Ambrosio Nguyen Van Si as the General Definitor of the Order of Friar Minor for Asian-Oceania, Br. Vitor José Melícial Lopes, OFM, delegation of the General Minister for Saint Anthony Foundation of East Timor and Br. Paskalis Bruno Syukur, OFM, provincial minister of the province of St. Michael the Archangel, Indonesia.
II. My utopian dream
When I was studying in primary School, I did not think that some day I would be flying abroad. When I saw many people from my town had gone to study in
Until one day, one of my cousins went to visit us before he would go to study in
In the course of time, my dream was not unreachable. Sometimes I said to myself: are you having a day dream or building a castle on the air, Afmend? Let bygone be bygone, it was just a dream but my wish was bigger; take it easy man. Don’t be disappointed because “where there a will there is a way”.
When I was in the Convent of Fatuberliu, suddenly, I heard good information: «5 brothers will go to study in
One day, I was called by
III. Flied: Timor-Portugal
“The time will be coming, don’t be sad! I have to go, but I will come back” I could not say anymore words when I glared to my parents’ face. My father answered: “you have to go…if it is impossible, this is your home”
Before we left our native land, with parents, relatives and closed friends we did the farewell ceremony in Becora. It was begun with the Eucharist which presided by
On the 29th of January at 10 am we got out from
The watch showed 3pm, when I saw Merpati air craft’s door was opened, with tears on the eyes just said “good bye” to my parents, brothers and sisters, several closed friends who were present there. In that circumstance I did not say anything, I could not speak with them, and the tears are my words. The airport was flooded with tears neither us nor them, that chance was hurtful for all of us.
When Merpati airplane (MZ 8498) flied from Timor Leste, perhaps anybody broke down. We arrived in
The later day, we took a little bit of the spare time to walk around the city of
From
IV. Leiria memory
The first time, we treaded in the Portuguese land, I was surprised when saw the new surroundings. I said to myself: will I be adaptable to the new environment?
There, we were picked up by Br. Moises OFM, Br. Pedro Santos OFM and 3 postulant brothers (Now temporary profession). We did our journey from
For the first trimester, I was conscious that I would begin again so I tried to put everything in order. I had to face “culture shock” because everything was new for me; every day I had to ask…ask and ask! The winter was like enemy for me: almost I did not get out from bed, also I did not study. In the church I could not pray or gave attention to mass. It was the first time for us to fell the winter season.
Thank God, we had 3 nice brothers whom always helped us.
For a year and half, I was ministering in “Fraternidade juvenil vocacional de Leiria”. There, I got many experiences in building up my life.
Day by day were appeared to us so many nice people. Finally, my utopian dream in Timor was not true; «Portuguese people is disagreeable» on the contrary
Along those chances, I had taken part in several activities which I found where marking my own history; those were the guns for my future.
- European Franciscan meeting
The first time for me took part into the second European Franciscan meeting (Euframe) in
For 6 days, we followed step by step the way of
Although it was summer time, we were very enthusiastic to follow the way of Saint Francis until Compostela. We had to climb the mountain; thirsty, hungry, tired, perspire… but we had spirit in the same way and destination: Franciscans charisma. We wanted to follow Jesus Christ like Francis of Assisi.
How wonderful was the catechesis of Cardinal Oscar A. Rodriquez Maradiaga. He said: «all of us really need three satellites in our life: bread of words - Gospel (El pan de
How nice was the homily from president of union of Friars Minors of Europe, Br. Victor Melícias, OFM. We have to be ourselves “universal Brotherhood “although we are different culture, race, color, social status, language or religion.
In the last was the message of Br. José Rodriguez Carvalho, OFM, the general minister of the Order of Friar Minor. He said: “Don’t be afraid to open the doors of your heart to Christ!” (No tengáis medo! abrid las puertas de vuestro corazón a Cristo) Then he advised: « Faite ver » (allowed your self to see).
All of us were invited to rebuild this world; annunciate the name of Christ, say to every body « Peace and Good – Pax et Bonum» and we have to be ourselves «Buen Camino Buena Gente - Good people good way ». We must to spread to the universe the values of the Gospel, especially giving our testimony about our Faith.
b. Taizé meeting
I was very happy moment when I attended the Taize meeting, realized in
We were invited to share our daily life like young based on the letter of brother Alóis: «the letter for
c. Portuguese course (Minho university, Braga)
The language is a door where we can see the world, which draw the limits of our thinking and felling.
We were following the Portuguese course «curso de língua portuguesa não materna» for a month in the
That course was fruitful of helping us to develop our Portuguese. We were very glad because all the teachers and classmates were very nice; they always prepared to help us when we had any difficulties. For those chances, we did field strip to: museum, castle…Etc. I hope that some day I will back to this alma mater.
d. The pilgrim: Franciscan Youth of
On the 6th of August 2010, at 9 pm, 50 young people took the way on direction to
a. Portiuncula
Portiuncula is the amazing place for Franciscan, Saint Francis died here. Every day we can see lost of people in that sacred place, mainly in the “pardon of
b.
The Sanctuary of Franciscan, here Saint Francis received the Stigma of Christ. The last day we took the way from
Both places are the best sanctuary for the Franciscan. I felt and experienced the taste of the Franciscan charisma, I very thankful because of this given chance to visit the holy land of Franciscan. Those were wonderful experiences for me before I entered into novitiate.
Conclusion
The famous Portuguese poet Fernando Pessoa said: God wishes, man dreams and born the fear. Human being is a dreamer; the megalomaniacs man always dream to transform the world: homo sapiens- create the fabulous culture of knowledge. Homo Faber- can transform the world full of wonder and pleasure. Those are the fruit of the human being dreams, the life without dream is sad.
Everybody has a dream. The question is “how” we can reach it? From my humble judgments these are the ways to find it.
The first: THINK- thinks about the values of life like.
The second: BELIEVE- believe in God and yourself and try to be an author of your personal history.
The third: DREAM- dream about the possible things based on your faith.
The fourth: BRAVE- brave to transform your dream into reality.
I ever had a dream when I was a child, although sometime my desire broke down but in the last my dream transformed into reality, just make an effort to reach my last step; to be happy.
To be happy is something which everybody wants to reach; if you want to become glad in the future ever since try to be an author of your personal history so I try to describe this precious history for my life.
«To be happy is recognizing that worthwhile live although all challenges, incomprehension and the period of crisis along the life. To be happy is leaving become victim of the problems and try to be an author of personal history» (Fernando Pessoa)
Prayer
Thank you oh Lord!
You created me by your image and similitude,
I am the only one and unrepeatable,
You deposited in my “being” all the human faculty:
Intelligent to understand,
Memory to retain,
Heart to ruminate
And ear to listen.
Thank you oh Lord!
How wonderful you created me;
I am a being:
Who capable to grow
To choose
To love and to be loved
I am sensible and responsible
I could happy or sad
Suffer or pain,
Those are my human nature.
Thank you oh Lord!
I count myself lucky for having a fantastic parent,
They cared for me since I was in my mother’s breast,
They always present in my quotidian life,
Daddy and mammy, thank you for everything,
Lord, I praise you for them.
Thank you oh Lord!
For the helping of my teachers, donators, close friends;
Who cross with me every day along my life
Who share with me the happiness and sadness, sufferings and pains
Who help me along my growing ways
They are the best gift given by you
By them I will be my own self.
Dear Lord,
I am an emigrant in the world; the pilgrim of being,
When I close myself for other, I am nothing;
Take me out from my selfish world,
Help me to open the door of my world to others around me,
Oh Lord, I grateful to you,
You make my life as a blank sheet
Where I have to fill in with my own personal history
The silver party of my birth day
